Grounded in Space

(from May 25)

I haven't written for a while and I apologize for that. Mostly to myself, even though I know some of you out there are reading (which makes me smile so big every time you tell me you read), because who knows what great stroke of genius I could create if I just wrote more. Even if I just remembered more because I have written, that would be reason enough.

The funny thing is, I am totally out here man. What I mean is the world I inhabit is ultimately different than yours, which makes it really really hard to talk about my days. I also lack time, something I initially thought I would have an abundance of.

I just got off work at 3:30 (pretty rad considering it is our first CSA day, and we kicked it's ass) and I am sitting at the picnic table outside of my kitchen. Nobody is around right now, something that rarely happens, and I can hear the leaves crinkle in the air. The chickens are behind me, squawking randomly, making clucking noises as they lay their eggs. The birds are just chimes that surround me, all sounding different, and always so captivating. You can hear the life talking all around me, and suddenly I do not feel alone anymore. It's comforting. 

Life up here is so much brighter in so many ways. It smells rich, it tastes fresh, it sounds big and round. I can't remember feeling this way before about where I live. I wonder about why I have been in a city for so long - I know why a city is fun and exciting, and I'm glad I moved to SF when I did, and I am feeling happy knowing it is a place to visit. Maybe I will continue to live in Oakland and do work there, but I just see this in my future. Farming my own food, cultivating community, having space and quiet and stars and birds. 

I do not know where this journey will lead me. I do not know what kind of work I will want to do after but I am starting to dream about it.